Toby’s Take on Life – Toby C

On Wednesday I turned 18, and I thought that at my new wise old age, I should impart the wisdom I have gathered over the last 18 years to the more youthful members of our community (AKA Mr. Hodson). It has been hard to filter down so many life lessons into 20 points, but I hope each one will help you as much as they have helped me (and will help Mr. Hodson!)

  1. If you have an egg, you have a meal.
  2. If you come across a bear in the woods, don’t play ‘dead’ play ‘Dad’ and teach it how to ride a bike without stabilizers.
  3. Always be quiet round a sleeping person.
  4. If you’re a cat person, learn to love dogs, ASAP!
  5. Don’t pet the sweaty stuff, nor sweat the petty stuff.
  6. Learn gibberish.
  7. Make an effort with your siblings.
  8. If all else fails, talk about the weather.
  9. Drink tea, (but only if you want a cup of tea!)
  10. Use deodorant.
  11. Always carry around a thimble, in case you are kidnapped by pirates.
  12. Read Harry Potter.
  13. Learn the formation of an oxbow lake.
  14. If you come across a lion, run away.
  15. Always have a Casio watch as a spare.
  16. Learn the days of the week.
  17. If you have two eggs, you have a feast.
  18. Watch the news.
  19. Read Harry potter again.
  20. Use instant yeast because life is too short.

I hope these pearls of wisdom allow you to become the well-rounded adults that we all aspire to be. This is my take on life, and how to be the best at it. Mr Hodson, you’re welcome!  

1 thought on “Toby’s Take on Life – Toby C

  • September 30, 2022 at 1:04 pm

    Re: instant yeast. It requires kneading. Sourdough does not. Take time to save time. Put that in your proverb pipe and smoke it.

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